Someone emailed me the sales listing for the first house Travis designed. He designed it specifically for me and we lived in it for 4 years. (We sold it years ago.) As I looked at the 30 pictures on the site, I was surprised by the multitude of mixed emotions running through me all at once. Not that I'm attached to the house, per se. I have no desire to move back there. But all these memories came flooding back. Little video clips of all the different people who either lived with us or lived life with us (or both) during that period of time.
Celeste (foster child) took her very first steps in the living room of that house while I knelt with open arms to swoop her up when she toddled. She would also stand holding on to the couch and try to do a dance we called "the diaper wag." She said her first words (calling me Mama) in her bedroom with that cute crib and her contagious grin. Ah, she came so far and we were honored to see such improvement while she stayed with us. Even though she's long forgotten us, we still remember her. 6 different kids learned to ride a bike down our hill. I can hear their trepidation and laughter still. "B" told part of her story for the first time in my driveway. "A" felt safe enough to finally tell someone what really happened to him. I can remember the relief on his face. Adrianne completely stole our hearts in a matter of days. I miss her so much! Bee Bee and TiTi finally had a family (us) say they would take them for respite a second time. And I loved "N" as if he were my own. The list could go on and on. What a privilege to have these experiences!
That's just the kids we had short term. Oh the memories of our biological children as well! We had invented games, like Avalanche Forest, and special hideouts and play forts within our 6 trails that we (I mean Trav) hand macheted. We first home schooled in that house, raised chickens, read together, played together, achieved so many milestones and experienced so many things that solidified us as a family unit and gave us enough resolve for the coming days.
Not all memories were easy. We had a lot of sickness and more loss in that house. But now that we have a half decade of distance from it, it's much easier to see how we grew and were pruned during that time. I'm not completely over it, nor do I have complete understanding, but it's much better on this side!!!
So thank you, current owners of our Caroline house, for putting so many pictures on your web site. Thank you to a great friend who sent the link to me. Thank you, all my kids, for letting me be your mom! Thank you so much to Trav, for loving me for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health!!!!!!! Our vows have been tested and found to be tried and true!
Forever thankful!!!
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Ingenuity saves the day....or I mean night.
Every marriage has their share of frivolous problems. Not deal breakers or anything important, just minor irritants that grate along the way. We've had 2 related "problems" since moving back to VA. The first: we gave away our queen sized bed frame/unit before leaving AL. We weren't sure where we were going or what would fit in the moving van, so we erred on the generous side and gave a bunch away. We kept our queen top mattress and have been sleeping on the floor since end of last July. Minor irritant #1: wifey doesn't like to sleep on the floor, and does she like the 'freshly moved' look. Nor is it good to sleep on the floor when you suffer a knee injury from biking (me), a car wreck that hurts your back/neck (still me) or when you're weak from a SIX WEEK recovery period from pneumonia/blood infection (hubby).
Finally, in January, we found a nice king size bed frame at a consignment store. It's nice looking, yet manly enough and we scheduled a time to pick it up. We couldn't afford a king mattress now, but we were at least moving in the right direction, right? Well, we went to pick it up and they said, "Oh Yeah, the mattress conveys." Yippee!! I thought this was an answer to my prayers until I laid down on it. I've slept on rocks that are softer. My hubby was in heaven! He said the seemingly brick lined mattress helped his back and gave him better sleep than he's had in years. So now, he slept on the king bed and I was still on the queen mattress on the floor. This went on for 4 months! Minor irritant #2: We both hate having 2 beds in our room, but we hate being tired even more.
So last Friday night, while we were discussing what to do about our 9 month long mattress conundrum and our lack of extra money to fix it, I half jokingly said, "It's too bad you can't cut my squishy queen bed and your rock solid king and make one king size mattress with two equal parts."
...............5 seconds of silence...........
His eyes got "that look" and I knew I had struck gold. The next day, my hubby spent about 8 hours hand cutting our mattresses and fitting them back together with a custom industrial sewing job. This took a lot of precision and patience, but the end result was 2 equal sized mattresses on one frame. And it simultaneously fixed Minor Irritant #3: I'm a bed hog. Hubby swears I take 75% of any shared bed. Now there is a definite line where my side ends.
So, after months on end, last night we both finally got to sleep in a comfortable bed together!! It was the best night of sleep we've had since moving here! Yay for ingenuity saving our backs and our wallets. Now we're taking suggestions about how to BEST USE for all the leftover parts. We've had many good suggestions~~ like moon shoes, rocket launchers and the like. I'm sure there will be a "post mattress" post sometime this summer. We tend to get really creative when the kids are out of school.
Or perhaps we'll incorporate it somehow into Punkin Chunkin' 2012?
Time will tell. Blessings!
Picture 1: Travis enjoying the fruits of his labor after a Sunday hike!
Picture 2: some of the extra parts!
Finally, in January, we found a nice king size bed frame at a consignment store. It's nice looking, yet manly enough and we scheduled a time to pick it up. We couldn't afford a king mattress now, but we were at least moving in the right direction, right? Well, we went to pick it up and they said, "Oh Yeah, the mattress conveys." Yippee!! I thought this was an answer to my prayers until I laid down on it. I've slept on rocks that are softer. My hubby was in heaven! He said the seemingly brick lined mattress helped his back and gave him better sleep than he's had in years. So now, he slept on the king bed and I was still on the queen mattress on the floor. This went on for 4 months! Minor irritant #2: We both hate having 2 beds in our room, but we hate being tired even more.
So last Friday night, while we were discussing what to do about our 9 month long mattress conundrum and our lack of extra money to fix it, I half jokingly said, "It's too bad you can't cut my squishy queen bed and your rock solid king and make one king size mattress with two equal parts."
...............5 seconds of silence...........
His eyes got "that look" and I knew I had struck gold. The next day, my hubby spent about 8 hours hand cutting our mattresses and fitting them back together with a custom industrial sewing job. This took a lot of precision and patience, but the end result was 2 equal sized mattresses on one frame. And it simultaneously fixed Minor Irritant #3: I'm a bed hog. Hubby swears I take 75% of any shared bed. Now there is a definite line where my side ends.
So, after months on end, last night we both finally got to sleep in a comfortable bed together!! It was the best night of sleep we've had since moving here! Yay for ingenuity saving our backs and our wallets. Now we're taking suggestions about how to BEST USE for all the leftover parts. We've had many good suggestions~~ like moon shoes, rocket launchers and the like. I'm sure there will be a "post mattress" post sometime this summer. We tend to get really creative when the kids are out of school.
Or perhaps we'll incorporate it somehow into Punkin Chunkin' 2012?
Time will tell. Blessings!
Picture 1: Travis enjoying the fruits of his labor after a Sunday hike!
Picture 2: some of the extra parts!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Come on in! (but watch your step!)
hos·pi·tal·i·ty
noun.
1. the friendly reception and treatment of guests or strangers.
This was a rough morning. On Easter morning, when it seems most people don their new outfits and perfect hair, anticipating their Norman Rockwell family gatherings, our clan was struggling just to be vertical. I didn't brush my hair before our church service (headbands are awesome), my son wore camo shorts with a mismatched top, my daughter in jeans that she pawed through the dryer to get, and my husband was in shorts. Nope. No new outfits or decorated houses on this end. And things got progressively worse as the morning drew on. Church was a challenge for us today and we pretty much limped home. (Disclaimer: We love Jesus and his resurrection, so no problems there). The state of our house pretty reflected the mood of the day. None of us bothered to clean up after our light lunch, the kids haven't done their weekend chores yet, and 4 loads of laundry that had been folded, but not put away.....all stacked in the middle of our living room floor. Instead of pushing through, Travis and I decided to throw in the towel and just go lie down.
Glory day! Don't you wanna hang out with us?? So upstairs: Travis and Emily are reading, and I'm trying to sleep and my son is lying beside me talking. Knock, knock, knock. I told my son to go get the door, thinking it may be a child he can play with outside. He yells back up, "It's some guy I don't know." So Travis and I went to answer the door. There stands a spiffed up young man in a suit and tie. He says to my husband, "Mr. L****, Sorry I didn't catch you at church, so I found out where you lived and decided to stop by. Can we talk?"
Ack!
For a brief moment, I was embarrassed and had thoughts of hiding. But after that split second, the truth of this reality sunk in: He's just a person, a fellow sojourner in this life, standing at my door, asking for some time and help. I invited the young man in. My hubby seamlessly stalled a tad by chatting in the foyer while I took 15 seconds and piled the laundry in a corner. (Hmmmm, we seem practiced at this maneuver. Wonder why?) Then we sat down in our living room in the midst of our chaos and gave him our undivided attention. When it became apparent that he only needed to talk to my hubby, I politely excused myself and came back up to lie back down.
This isn't big news, but it reminded me at least one area where I'm improving. 10 years ago the above scenario would have bothered me. I may have asked him to come back at a better time, or tried to speed clean throughout the visit to bolster appearances. But now I more quickly see the real truth: appearances aren't what matters~~ the heart is. By the time he finished talking, this young man walked away from our house smiling and encouraged. Not because he was in a perfect looking house, or because he caught us on a good day. He walked away encouraged because he was welcomed in (friendly reception)and loved to the best of our ability (treatment of strangers) for the time he was here.
So I guess that's my nugget of the day: Hospitality is not complicated. Yes, we live in an appearance oriented culture, but we don't have to have it all together to show love to a stranger. All of us can smile, invite someone in, be attentive to their needs and give an encouraging word. ~No matter if we're having a hard day, or surrounded by a bit of clutter. We all have gifts, talents, and love to share. Thankfully, this is not an isolated occurrence. The more we practice our open door policy, the more people seem to just show up. And we wouldn't trade it! We like it this way.
Now we're off to visit another family who invited us to their house for this holiday. It'll be nice to be on the receiving end of hospitality today too.
Blessings to you all this Resurrection Sunday!
noun.
1. the friendly reception and treatment of guests or strangers.
This was a rough morning. On Easter morning, when it seems most people don their new outfits and perfect hair, anticipating their Norman Rockwell family gatherings, our clan was struggling just to be vertical. I didn't brush my hair before our church service (headbands are awesome), my son wore camo shorts with a mismatched top, my daughter in jeans that she pawed through the dryer to get, and my husband was in shorts. Nope. No new outfits or decorated houses on this end. And things got progressively worse as the morning drew on. Church was a challenge for us today and we pretty much limped home. (Disclaimer: We love Jesus and his resurrection, so no problems there). The state of our house pretty reflected the mood of the day. None of us bothered to clean up after our light lunch, the kids haven't done their weekend chores yet, and 4 loads of laundry that had been folded, but not put away.....all stacked in the middle of our living room floor. Instead of pushing through, Travis and I decided to throw in the towel and just go lie down.
Glory day! Don't you wanna hang out with us?? So upstairs: Travis and Emily are reading, and I'm trying to sleep and my son is lying beside me talking. Knock, knock, knock. I told my son to go get the door, thinking it may be a child he can play with outside. He yells back up, "It's some guy I don't know." So Travis and I went to answer the door. There stands a spiffed up young man in a suit and tie. He says to my husband, "Mr. L****, Sorry I didn't catch you at church, so I found out where you lived and decided to stop by. Can we talk?"
Ack!
For a brief moment, I was embarrassed and had thoughts of hiding. But after that split second, the truth of this reality sunk in: He's just a person, a fellow sojourner in this life, standing at my door, asking for some time and help. I invited the young man in. My hubby seamlessly stalled a tad by chatting in the foyer while I took 15 seconds and piled the laundry in a corner. (Hmmmm, we seem practiced at this maneuver. Wonder why?) Then we sat down in our living room in the midst of our chaos and gave him our undivided attention. When it became apparent that he only needed to talk to my hubby, I politely excused myself and came back up to lie back down.
This isn't big news, but it reminded me at least one area where I'm improving. 10 years ago the above scenario would have bothered me. I may have asked him to come back at a better time, or tried to speed clean throughout the visit to bolster appearances. But now I more quickly see the real truth: appearances aren't what matters~~ the heart is. By the time he finished talking, this young man walked away from our house smiling and encouraged. Not because he was in a perfect looking house, or because he caught us on a good day. He walked away encouraged because he was welcomed in (friendly reception)and loved to the best of our ability (treatment of strangers) for the time he was here.
So I guess that's my nugget of the day: Hospitality is not complicated. Yes, we live in an appearance oriented culture, but we don't have to have it all together to show love to a stranger. All of us can smile, invite someone in, be attentive to their needs and give an encouraging word. ~No matter if we're having a hard day, or surrounded by a bit of clutter. We all have gifts, talents, and love to share. Thankfully, this is not an isolated occurrence. The more we practice our open door policy, the more people seem to just show up. And we wouldn't trade it! We like it this way.
Now we're off to visit another family who invited us to their house for this holiday. It'll be nice to be on the receiving end of hospitality today too.
Blessings to you all this Resurrection Sunday!
Monday, April 2, 2012
Virginia ERs: the 2012 tours have begun. :-/
I'm writing today to update everyone (It's been a while! So, Hi!) and give a PSA about a new medical deception out there.
But first things first. We've had a pretty quiet first quarter of 2012. Everyone has been relatively healthy, all the jobs are steady, kids are enjoying school, the weather has been great, our friends are wonderful, etc etc. We were having a great Sunday yesterday. A few families came over to do lunch and let the kiddos play. In the evening, my son was playing with some boys in our unfinished basement. Na was doing amateur kung fu when he decided to punch the insulation. It's fluffy, right? Well, he quickly found out there's a concrete wall behind the soft stuff and broke his hand. Nice. So sent Emily home with the other family and packed up to visit our friends at Lee's Hill ER.
We arrived to a packed parking lot, so we went in and asked their wait time. 2hrs. Yikes! So we called Spotsy Reg. up the hill. They told us on the phone and had a sign outside their ER that said "28 minute wait time." So we signed in and broke out the UNO cards. 2 hrs. later, they brought us back, just to register us. Travis was kinda snarky about it being 2 hours and us not having a room or being seen or X-rays or anything with the "28 minute" estimate. The receptionist lady piped up and said, "Oh that? That's intentionally misleading just to get people here. The 28 minutes is our best guess at how long it will take you to be seen once we get you assigned to a bed." Then she proceeded to tell us that after we registered, we'd be back in the waiting room.
We decided at that point to just go home, get some sleep, and try again in the morning. We used our own moldable plastic (my hubby's a designer) and made a personalized splint, wrapped his hand, and Na was sound asleep before I got home with our daughter. We did go to Prime Care, see a doc and get X-rays confirming the break today. We're off to see a specialist this afternoon. So if you pray, please pray for my little guy. And if you find yourself in need of an ER, remember the "wait time" signs are intentionally misleading and find out what the estimated REAL wait time is. (There's my PSA!)
More later after we see the specialist.
#neveradullmoment
But first things first. We've had a pretty quiet first quarter of 2012. Everyone has been relatively healthy, all the jobs are steady, kids are enjoying school, the weather has been great, our friends are wonderful, etc etc. We were having a great Sunday yesterday. A few families came over to do lunch and let the kiddos play. In the evening, my son was playing with some boys in our unfinished basement. Na was doing amateur kung fu when he decided to punch the insulation. It's fluffy, right? Well, he quickly found out there's a concrete wall behind the soft stuff and broke his hand. Nice. So sent Emily home with the other family and packed up to visit our friends at Lee's Hill ER.
We arrived to a packed parking lot, so we went in and asked their wait time. 2hrs. Yikes! So we called Spotsy Reg. up the hill. They told us on the phone and had a sign outside their ER that said "28 minute wait time." So we signed in and broke out the UNO cards. 2 hrs. later, they brought us back, just to register us. Travis was kinda snarky about it being 2 hours and us not having a room or being seen or X-rays or anything with the "28 minute" estimate. The receptionist lady piped up and said, "Oh that? That's intentionally misleading just to get people here. The 28 minutes is our best guess at how long it will take you to be seen once we get you assigned to a bed." Then she proceeded to tell us that after we registered, we'd be back in the waiting room.
We decided at that point to just go home, get some sleep, and try again in the morning. We used our own moldable plastic (my hubby's a designer) and made a personalized splint, wrapped his hand, and Na was sound asleep before I got home with our daughter. We did go to Prime Care, see a doc and get X-rays confirming the break today. We're off to see a specialist this afternoon. So if you pray, please pray for my little guy. And if you find yourself in need of an ER, remember the "wait time" signs are intentionally misleading and find out what the estimated REAL wait time is. (There's my PSA!)
More later after we see the specialist.
#neveradullmoment
Sunday, March 4, 2012
The Sun Must Set To Rise a New Day. :)
New Beginning. The old is gone. The new has come. Fresh start! It's what I've hoped for, for a long time. It's what I thought I would have when I moved to Auburn, AL, but alas, no dice. It was a wonderful time, Yes!! ~a time of growth, and a time of accomplishment for all of us. It was a 2 year morph in the way we think, totally changing our patterns and definitions of what is acceptable. It wasn't our new beginning, but our wake up call to see some things clearly for the first time. In many ways it was a teaser ~ a hiatus as we healed and prepared to unknowingly step back into the VA fray. The sabbatical ended when we moved back here. Anyone who read my "Merry Christmas part 1" blog post can see a tiny sliver of how we moved back to more of the same old same old with one exception: I see things differently now. So when the new year came up, I thought, "Whew! Glad that's over. FINALLY, it's time to start afresh, right?"
January just held more of the same. The two milestone times for change (moving and new year) came and went in a trudging fashion. We had a fun time ringing in the new year with friends but once again I felt no change nor start of anything different. Just when I thought it wasn't going to happen, I felt the change. Around mid January there was a shift in my life. I can't describe it well, but it's a spiritual shift that can only be experienced, not properly explained. I started getting a sense that an era was finally ending. And I mean ending-ending. Not only was God ending a chapter of my life, but an entire book!! YAY! A new book means I don't have to continue the old story line any more. Not even a sequel! He's setting us up for something completely new. I began letting go, closing things down, and moving on. Thank you, God!
Moving on to what? I'm not sure yet. I don't have a sense at the moment that we'll be physically moving anytime soon, (but let's be honest, that's always a wild card in our lives). Instead, I sense that the second half of January, all of February and who-knows-how-much-longer will finish this "ending cycle", freeing us up to walk into something new here very soon. Partially, we already have started to walk into some new things, but more on that as it develops. And I'm anticipating more and more to come. I'll hopefully keep you posted.
I went to church today and the entire service was dedicated to this exact same thing. The time is now. New starts. Shifting directions. Closing of one era to usher in a new one. Milestones. Markers in the sand. "From this day forth!" type stuff. They said this service was for me and I believe it. I wondered when to publish this post. ***I wanted to have a more sure explanation of the "new" before posting, but after the service today confirmed what I've been feeling/experiencing for months, I figured it's time to push "post." Hopefully this is an encouragement to some of you out there. I love that some have walked with us on this crazy path. Although we've lost some loved ones along the way, It is our hope that many of you will continue with us and others will be added. The best is yet to come! Thanks for being a part (in whatever way) of our community. It really does take a village. Glad you're a part of mine!
January just held more of the same. The two milestone times for change (moving and new year) came and went in a trudging fashion. We had a fun time ringing in the new year with friends but once again I felt no change nor start of anything different. Just when I thought it wasn't going to happen, I felt the change. Around mid January there was a shift in my life. I can't describe it well, but it's a spiritual shift that can only be experienced, not properly explained. I started getting a sense that an era was finally ending. And I mean ending-ending. Not only was God ending a chapter of my life, but an entire book!! YAY! A new book means I don't have to continue the old story line any more. Not even a sequel! He's setting us up for something completely new. I began letting go, closing things down, and moving on. Thank you, God!
Moving on to what? I'm not sure yet. I don't have a sense at the moment that we'll be physically moving anytime soon, (but let's be honest, that's always a wild card in our lives). Instead, I sense that the second half of January, all of February and who-knows-how-much-longer will finish this "ending cycle", freeing us up to walk into something new here very soon. Partially, we already have started to walk into some new things, but more on that as it develops. And I'm anticipating more and more to come. I'll hopefully keep you posted.
I went to church today and the entire service was dedicated to this exact same thing. The time is now. New starts. Shifting directions. Closing of one era to usher in a new one. Milestones. Markers in the sand. "From this day forth!" type stuff. They said this service was for me and I believe it. I wondered when to publish this post. ***I wanted to have a more sure explanation of the "new" before posting, but after the service today confirmed what I've been feeling/experiencing for months, I figured it's time to push "post." Hopefully this is an encouragement to some of you out there. I love that some have walked with us on this crazy path. Although we've lost some loved ones along the way, It is our hope that many of you will continue with us and others will be added. The best is yet to come! Thanks for being a part (in whatever way) of our community. It really does take a village. Glad you're a part of mine!
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Why we DO NOT recommend P143!
New information recently came to light. Now that we have had a bit of time to recover from the blow of the discovered information, dear followers of our journey, I feel the need to set some things straight.
First thing is, Travis and I hate lying. In any form. We even have a 100% honesty policy with each other and especially with our kids. This includes no Santa, no Tooth Fairy, and many many other more important matters. Of course, there are times when we've had to say, "I can't answer that right now, but I will when you're older." Both our kids have now had some "when you're older" talks and they know we were telling the truth then, too. I'm not perfect, but I try really hard to be as honest as I can, as much as I can.
So with that being said, I also REALLY hate it when people give me false information and I unknowingly pass it along. For some of you friends/readers, you've been on the receiving end of that for the past few months. Please let me explain: When we looked into hosting, we chose and organization that claimed they only hosted orphans. We signed up to to host over winter break to bless an orphan with a family experience over the holidays. In public, we weren't supposed to emphasize the orphan status, but to emphasize the cultural exchange part of the orphan program. But in private, our motive was to first, help an orphan and second, see how they fit into our family for possible future adoption. The agency knew this about us and encouraged us in this thinking. They sent us photos of many children they said were orphans. When we narrowed it down to two, the reason we picked Evija is they told us she was a single adoptable orphan~ meaning no parents or siblings and available for international adoption. Yes, our desire was to help a child who had no one.
We knew from the first day we got Evija that something was wrong. Evija talked about her mom, dad, and 6 siblings from the get-go. We called immediately and asked the director of the program about it. She chided us for "arguing with the kids" and said she must be talking about foster parents and foster siblings. The program director insisted they only work with orphans, so Evija had to be one or she wouldn't be in the program. But the tone of the program director didn't sit right with us, so we formally requested information on her legal status from day 2 in the program. We continued to ask about it in every weekly report and always got the same "I don't know. We're checking" answer. **If a program doesn't know, they shouldn't SEND!! But I digress. The bad news comes in a minute.
The truth FINALLY was revealed to us within days of Evija's departure. Lo and behold, Evija was honest and the program was not. She is not an orphan and does indeed still have on going relationships/ visitations with her mother, step dad and 6 siblings. They said care rights have been terminated on her mother(much like our foster system), but that parental rights were still in tact. Evija is not adoptable one bit. She's not an orphan one bit either. Yep. We were totally DUPED. And for those of you out there who may have sympathy for this agency, let me tell you this: THERE IS NO WAY THEY DIDN'T KNOW THIS!! On her last day here, we asked one of the non-involved substitute chaperones to look at Evija's paperwork for us. ***They had to get her biological mom's permission to send her out of the country!!!!!*** THEY KNEW UP FRONT SHE WASN'T AN ORPHAN.
So they 1. lied when they recommended her as an orphan, 2. lied when they sent her to us, 3. lied on day two when we called and 4. lied in every weekly report when they said they didn't know. THEY KNEW!! If you have to get the parent's permission, then you know the child is not an orphan!!! And the paperwork was here the whole time with her passports and medical cards. It took Everita (the chaperone) less than a minute to tell us. Grrr. There I go growling again, but trust me, this is worth a growl.
Don't get me wrong: Evija was a wonderful host child and if we are talking about just the hosting part, then we had a great experience. Evija was trustworthy, helpful and kind. However, we weren't hosting just so a foreign exchange student could have a VERY EXPENSIVE VACATION. We specifically picked an orphans-only (or at least claimed to be an orphans-only) program and we were interested in helping someone who has no one. And getting a chance to see if an orphan would fit into our family for future adoption.
So my apologies to you all that I trusted some very untrustworthy people. And that I passed on untruths b/c I was lied to myself. I'm sorry you were mislead. I'm sorry I was mislead. I'm sorry my husband and children were mislead.
So once again, please pray for our family. We still have a heart to help kids who have no family. We still want to expand our family through adoption some day. We still want to keep our home open to those who need it. It's been an interesting ride over the years with providing care for various kids, for various time frames. We're not done yet, not by a long shot. Pray that God would guide us and direct us and keep us far away from dishonest agencies like Project 143.
Please, Lord, guide us in TRUTH!!!!
First thing is, Travis and I hate lying. In any form. We even have a 100% honesty policy with each other and especially with our kids. This includes no Santa, no Tooth Fairy, and many many other more important matters. Of course, there are times when we've had to say, "I can't answer that right now, but I will when you're older." Both our kids have now had some "when you're older" talks and they know we were telling the truth then, too. I'm not perfect, but I try really hard to be as honest as I can, as much as I can.
So with that being said, I also REALLY hate it when people give me false information and I unknowingly pass it along. For some of you friends/readers, you've been on the receiving end of that for the past few months. Please let me explain: When we looked into hosting, we chose and organization that claimed they only hosted orphans. We signed up to to host over winter break to bless an orphan with a family experience over the holidays. In public, we weren't supposed to emphasize the orphan status, but to emphasize the cultural exchange part of the orphan program. But in private, our motive was to first, help an orphan and second, see how they fit into our family for possible future adoption. The agency knew this about us and encouraged us in this thinking. They sent us photos of many children they said were orphans. When we narrowed it down to two, the reason we picked Evija is they told us she was a single adoptable orphan~ meaning no parents or siblings and available for international adoption. Yes, our desire was to help a child who had no one.
We knew from the first day we got Evija that something was wrong. Evija talked about her mom, dad, and 6 siblings from the get-go. We called immediately and asked the director of the program about it. She chided us for "arguing with the kids" and said she must be talking about foster parents and foster siblings. The program director insisted they only work with orphans, so Evija had to be one or she wouldn't be in the program. But the tone of the program director didn't sit right with us, so we formally requested information on her legal status from day 2 in the program. We continued to ask about it in every weekly report and always got the same "I don't know. We're checking" answer. **If a program doesn't know, they shouldn't SEND!! But I digress. The bad news comes in a minute.
The truth FINALLY was revealed to us within days of Evija's departure. Lo and behold, Evija was honest and the program was not. She is not an orphan and does indeed still have on going relationships/ visitations with her mother, step dad and 6 siblings. They said care rights have been terminated on her mother(much like our foster system), but that parental rights were still in tact. Evija is not adoptable one bit. She's not an orphan one bit either. Yep. We were totally DUPED. And for those of you out there who may have sympathy for this agency, let me tell you this: THERE IS NO WAY THEY DIDN'T KNOW THIS!! On her last day here, we asked one of the non-involved substitute chaperones to look at Evija's paperwork for us. ***They had to get her biological mom's permission to send her out of the country!!!!!*** THEY KNEW UP FRONT SHE WASN'T AN ORPHAN.
So they 1. lied when they recommended her as an orphan, 2. lied when they sent her to us, 3. lied on day two when we called and 4. lied in every weekly report when they said they didn't know. THEY KNEW!! If you have to get the parent's permission, then you know the child is not an orphan!!! And the paperwork was here the whole time with her passports and medical cards. It took Everita (the chaperone) less than a minute to tell us. Grrr. There I go growling again, but trust me, this is worth a growl.
Don't get me wrong: Evija was a wonderful host child and if we are talking about just the hosting part, then we had a great experience. Evija was trustworthy, helpful and kind. However, we weren't hosting just so a foreign exchange student could have a VERY EXPENSIVE VACATION. We specifically picked an orphans-only (or at least claimed to be an orphans-only) program and we were interested in helping someone who has no one. And getting a chance to see if an orphan would fit into our family for future adoption.
So my apologies to you all that I trusted some very untrustworthy people. And that I passed on untruths b/c I was lied to myself. I'm sorry you were mislead. I'm sorry I was mislead. I'm sorry my husband and children were mislead.
So once again, please pray for our family. We still have a heart to help kids who have no family. We still want to expand our family through adoption some day. We still want to keep our home open to those who need it. It's been an interesting ride over the years with providing care for various kids, for various time frames. We're not done yet, not by a long shot. Pray that God would guide us and direct us and keep us far away from dishonest agencies like Project 143.
Please, Lord, guide us in TRUTH!!!!
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
A Sling-Shot Diary
Well, this is the final installment of the 'Evija-in-America' chapters in our Lontz Book of Life. She departed for Latvia a week ago. Although we had a slow start, this experience mimicked what I like to call the "sling shot" effect. Most displaced kids who initially pull away from our family don't get to stay there long. They quickly fall prey and succumb to our family's showering of affections and quirkiness. Then it's like they were a sling shot stretched tight that finally was released and BAM! They are ours in a rush! And we get to enjoy them being full throttle IN our family. As a legitimate member of the Brotherhood and Sisterhood of Team Lontz. For a short time. Then they have to leave. :( This is the way it's worked with all our years in foster care and in some more informal settings where we have provided care to those who need it.
I don't mind the first part of the "sling shot" effect, for I have confidence that LOVE WINS and in most cases, we'll see breakthrough in the lives of each child we encounter. There is NOTHING that compares to the joy of witnessing their growth and healing. Nothing can replace the satisfaction of being a part of that process. But it's the last part (the leaving) that I'm weary of tolerating in our lives. I had lunch with a close friend (a full member of Team Lontz) today. He knows me well; so he knows I don't deal well with pesky things like Loss or Closure or....Subtlety. He was asking me how I felt about some recent hard Losses in our lives and I responded with this dainty gem:
"I want to strangle people who say to me: 'It's better to have Loved and Lost than never to have Loved at all'!! Even though it's true, I wish these same people would acknowledge that it's BEST to Love and Keep in a consistent healthy relationship than Love and Lose!!!! Grrr!!!"
(Yes, I actually growled.)
What can I say? I have some pretty good friends who can handle me when I'm raw, honest, and face to face. In that, I'm so incredibly blessed! Also, the oft quoted adage rings true on some level. To those children and adults that I've Loved and Lost~ even though it hurts~ I'm honored I got the chance to Love you once. (and still do.) But, we do our best to be keepers when we can. All 4 of us founding members of Team Lontz absolutely LOVE our broad and very extended family we've been given over the years. We span several states and countries now. Yes, we've gone global!
BUT we all 4 also long for the long term. I really don't know if permanent adoption is in our future, but I know it's a desire of our hearts. Not that I would trade the calling we've had thus far. We love collecting family as we go through this crazy adventure called Life. We want to expand through honorary and permanent means. There's room in our lives to do both: They don't have to be mutually exclusive.
Why? Because we don't divide our love in this family. That's not God's way. We MULTIPLY it so it overflows!!!! Many times over. Amen and amen!
Love and blessings to you this night!
I don't mind the first part of the "sling shot" effect, for I have confidence that LOVE WINS and in most cases, we'll see breakthrough in the lives of each child we encounter. There is NOTHING that compares to the joy of witnessing their growth and healing. Nothing can replace the satisfaction of being a part of that process. But it's the last part (the leaving) that I'm weary of tolerating in our lives. I had lunch with a close friend (a full member of Team Lontz) today. He knows me well; so he knows I don't deal well with pesky things like Loss or Closure or....Subtlety. He was asking me how I felt about some recent hard Losses in our lives and I responded with this dainty gem:
"I want to strangle people who say to me: 'It's better to have Loved and Lost than never to have Loved at all'!! Even though it's true, I wish these same people would acknowledge that it's BEST to Love and Keep in a consistent healthy relationship than Love and Lose!!!! Grrr!!!"
(Yes, I actually growled.)
What can I say? I have some pretty good friends who can handle me when I'm raw, honest, and face to face. In that, I'm so incredibly blessed! Also, the oft quoted adage rings true on some level. To those children and adults that I've Loved and Lost~ even though it hurts~ I'm honored I got the chance to Love you once. (and still do.) But, we do our best to be keepers when we can. All 4 of us founding members of Team Lontz absolutely LOVE our broad and very extended family we've been given over the years. We span several states and countries now. Yes, we've gone global!
BUT we all 4 also long for the long term. I really don't know if permanent adoption is in our future, but I know it's a desire of our hearts. Not that I would trade the calling we've had thus far. We love collecting family as we go through this crazy adventure called Life. We want to expand through honorary and permanent means. There's room in our lives to do both: They don't have to be mutually exclusive.
Why? Because we don't divide our love in this family. That's not God's way. We MULTIPLY it so it overflows!!!! Many times over. Amen and amen!
Love and blessings to you this night!
Thursday, December 22, 2011
On a Brighter Note (Merry Christmas part 2 of 2)
Even though my last post was a vent, I am a very blessed person. I really hope everyone who read part one will also read part 2! This is by no means an exhaustive list, but rather a small portion of the goodness I'm pondering tonight. Please read on and enjoy!
I'm glad to be alive, have a wonderful husband and 2 blow-my-mind awesome kids. Just to have a family unit that's in tact, healthy, and enjoyable to be around is a rarity in this culture in this time. And I have all 3 qualities!! Amazing! I love that the 4 of us are on the same page and we're at a place where we can serve and play together. When we do stuff like host another child, we do it as a family. Even though the kids (specifically my oldest) is branching out, outside the family these days, our options for doing stuff together increases with meaningfulness as well. And it's good for us to gather others into our fold. Most days there are 2-5 extra kids hanging out with us. Broadening our sphere of influence for sure.
I have 2 jobs that I absolutely love. I look forward to going to work most days. How many people can say that? Even this week when my school job is on Christmas break, I worked 2 days at the PT aide job and left feeling fulfilled and happy that I could connect and help people by doing what comes naturally to me. I mean, when it comes to the PT aide job, they literally pay me for being myself. That's crazy! I walk in there smiling, and walk away smiling. Most of my clients walk in with ails and walk out feeling better and smiling as they have been blessed. A good set up? I tend to think so!
Living in Middle Class America, it's easy to forget what blessings we have daily. I live in a relatively clean, warm, dry, comfortable house. After working 2 years in AL w/ Alabama Rural Ministry who helps those with inadequate housing, my perspective is very different on that. And the conveniences we have! Are you acutely aware of how easy our housework is?! We have dishwashers available if we want them! And having a washer/dryer combo is quite normal. I can literally have my clothes and dishes being washed and dried FOR ME while I type this. These conveniences are MAJOR helps to those who wish to have clean dishes and clothes. We don't understand properly how nice those things are until you're washing EVERYthing by hand. So I love laundry and dishes. It's really just a few minutes of prep and the push of a few buttons.
I'm thankful for friends in my life! Both for the ones that are exiting my life, the ones that are just now entering my life, and those who are still in my life, whether here or away. I have been tremendously blessing in that category and to all of you, I say send heartfelt thanks and Love! No matter where I've gone, God has certainly brought an interesting and diverse collection of people in my life to love and cherish, sharpen and be sharpened. LOVE! And thank you to all, both friends and strangers alike, who poured out love and understanding with my last post. With me, you have to take the good, bad, and ugly all in one package. I'm super blessed by those who accept me (flawed as I am) and love me anyway.
THANK YOU!
I'm thankful for heaven. This world is not the end-all, be-all for us. So even though ails like what were outlined in my previous post happen, it's not the end of the story for me, or thankfully, my husband and kids! And this is made possible by the Reason for the Season! I'm thankful for Jesus, his birth, resurrection and life! I look forward to celebrating that with loved ones this weekend!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
"Keeping up with the Lontzes is like being a storm chaser!" ~Maria Stout (Merry Christams part 1)
I thought about making a year-end upbeat Christmas letter/card thingy this year, but considering the past 5 months, I opted to vent first. For those of you fear frankness, consider yourselves warned; this post is not for you.
Since we've been back in VA a mere 5 months ago, we've had a tire blow on the way here, we traveled 700 miles to find the renters left our place a literally CRAPPY MESS, we're in the negative with school loans, Nathan put a knife through his hand second day back (Happy Birthday, Travis) (ER visit #1), we had an earthquake, then we had a hurricane, I started 2 jobs, Nathan snapped 2 bones in his arm (ER visit #2), Nathan went on a field trip with his school and not one, but TWO cars rear-ended them and were totaled. Thankfully, Na didn't go to the ER with that one, but 12 of his friends did. No small trauma watching them being taken away on backboards and me trying to calm other kids whose parents weren't there yet.
Then I was driving home from work and stopped (7th car back) at a red light and was rear-ended. The car that hit me was totaled and my back was/is still hurt (ER visit #3). Before I could recover from that, Travis got very sick with pneumonia (ER visit #4) and was released after meds were given. Then, 15 hours later, the hospital calls and says Travis also has a blood infection and for us to come back. (ER visit #5). That turned into a 5 day very scary hospital stint that we'd like to never repeat. And this hospital stay burned all of Travis's leave that he planned to use when our exchange student (orphan from Latvia) came 4 days after he got out of the hospital. In fact, he's in the negative and that leaves him weakened (6 week projected recovery time) and him at work playing catch-up and understandably very tired when he gets home. Which leaves me doing this solo when we planned to do this together. Just in time for Christmas. At least he hasn't had knee surgery yet. That'll be a fun start to the new year with me holding 2 jobs and him not able to drive.
Nope. Our lives have had no stress at all lately.
Welcome back, Lontzes!! Virginia is STILL the land of suffering! (Have I mentioned I miss AL??) As we are limping exhaustedly into the home stretch of December, people around us are dropping like flies. My parents left for TX on the 18th, a family we Love and have Loved for 15 years is moving away on the 27th, our former mentors are moving off this continent on the 28th, and our neighbors, who have kids our kids' ages who come over almost daily are also moving a few days after that. Oh, and the person I trust the most outside my immediate family said they're not sure if they want to be friends with me anymore. Shoot me now. (that's a figure of speech, y'all) Really, though, if any of you has bad news to tell us now is the time. Our hearts are already broken and we're already beaten up and worn down. So lay it on us. We can take it. Apparently, we're stronger than we think.
For those of you out there who are formulating a rebuttal in your head, please don't type it out or call me. I don't want to hear how I should be joyful always or how I should be on anti-depressants for having feelings. I'm not depressed. I'm simply tired from the circumstances and couldn't fathom an end of the year letter without needing to vent first. I WILL make another post soon about the blessings going on in my life and what I'm thankful for. But it'll be another day. If you think it should be earlier, please see my previous entries. They're very positive for the most part. However, for tonight, this post is what it is.
Take me or leave me.
Since we've been back in VA a mere 5 months ago, we've had a tire blow on the way here, we traveled 700 miles to find the renters left our place a literally CRAPPY MESS, we're in the negative with school loans, Nathan put a knife through his hand second day back (Happy Birthday, Travis) (ER visit #1), we had an earthquake, then we had a hurricane, I started 2 jobs, Nathan snapped 2 bones in his arm (ER visit #2), Nathan went on a field trip with his school and not one, but TWO cars rear-ended them and were totaled. Thankfully, Na didn't go to the ER with that one, but 12 of his friends did. No small trauma watching them being taken away on backboards and me trying to calm other kids whose parents weren't there yet.
Then I was driving home from work and stopped (7th car back) at a red light and was rear-ended. The car that hit me was totaled and my back was/is still hurt (ER visit #3). Before I could recover from that, Travis got very sick with pneumonia (ER visit #4) and was released after meds were given. Then, 15 hours later, the hospital calls and says Travis also has a blood infection and for us to come back. (ER visit #5). That turned into a 5 day very scary hospital stint that we'd like to never repeat. And this hospital stay burned all of Travis's leave that he planned to use when our exchange student (orphan from Latvia) came 4 days after he got out of the hospital. In fact, he's in the negative and that leaves him weakened (6 week projected recovery time) and him at work playing catch-up and understandably very tired when he gets home. Which leaves me doing this solo when we planned to do this together. Just in time for Christmas. At least he hasn't had knee surgery yet. That'll be a fun start to the new year with me holding 2 jobs and him not able to drive.
Nope. Our lives have had no stress at all lately.
Welcome back, Lontzes!! Virginia is STILL the land of suffering! (Have I mentioned I miss AL??) As we are limping exhaustedly into the home stretch of December, people around us are dropping like flies. My parents left for TX on the 18th, a family we Love and have Loved for 15 years is moving away on the 27th, our former mentors are moving off this continent on the 28th, and our neighbors, who have kids our kids' ages who come over almost daily are also moving a few days after that. Oh, and the person I trust the most outside my immediate family said they're not sure if they want to be friends with me anymore. Shoot me now. (that's a figure of speech, y'all) Really, though, if any of you has bad news to tell us now is the time. Our hearts are already broken and we're already beaten up and worn down. So lay it on us. We can take it. Apparently, we're stronger than we think.
For those of you out there who are formulating a rebuttal in your head, please don't type it out or call me. I don't want to hear how I should be joyful always or how I should be on anti-depressants for having feelings. I'm not depressed. I'm simply tired from the circumstances and couldn't fathom an end of the year letter without needing to vent first. I WILL make another post soon about the blessings going on in my life and what I'm thankful for. But it'll be another day. If you think it should be earlier, please see my previous entries. They're very positive for the most part. However, for tonight, this post is what it is.
Take me or leave me.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
She's here!
I know I'm behind on this post, but we've been a bit overwhelmed lately. :)
Evija made it here safely! I will try to post a few photos next week. Some of you out there have rose colored glasses on in regards to orphan care. If you would like to continue with those on, please stop reading here and check back with me another time. Those of you who don't mind a tiny dose of edited reality, read on.
Things were off to a rough start. Evija greeted us with her arms crossed and quiet for the first few days. We quickly found out she understands little English and doesn't feel comfortable trying to speak it. Therefore she's had to endure our less than perfect Latvian grammar and our slowness in speech. It's been almost 12 years since we lived in Latvia, so Travis and I are more than a little rusty. And our kids don't speak Latvian at all. I feel for her. She had just traveled 4,500 miles to meet strangers, then have to stay in a hotel room with them. It's no wonder she was scared and less than happy to see us. Then her first impression of America was the New Jersey Turnpike. I don't care what Pat Mahoney says, that part of NJ is like the unshaved armpit of America. In addition to the smoking factory scenery and bumpy roads, her silence and unwillingness to communicate other than with body language (arms crossed and looking away) made for a VERY long first two days. We got home from our 7 hour miserable car ride and our thoughts were along the lines of, "What have we done?" and, "At this rate, this is going to be a looooong month."
Also, in the first few days, we had to deal with practical stuff, like introducing deodorant, toothbrushes, and American underwear sizes, and other feminine hygiene products. Yay me. The orphanage sent her with one and a half outfits for her month long stay (one pair of pants and 2 shirts.) Trying to navigate clothing purchases and some other female stuff within the first 2 days did not endear Miss Evija to liking me. I smiled a lot, tried very hard with the language, used my pocket translator, and my Latvian friend Marika translated some emails for me. We got through it. Introducing our household routines (like this is a dishwasher, these are the foods we eat, and here's how we do laundry, etc.) has been fairly smooth. She seems to catch on to our ways and she has an appreciation for how easy those things are here. (If only all American teens realized this!)
And I must point out the positive side: Evija is a trustworthy young lady! She's been respectful of our stuff, she's complied with bedtimes, basic rules, and such. After doing foster care, we're well aware of what we could be dealing with. I don't have to worry about her destroying things, wandering the house at night, or trying to hurt our kids. Compared to some kids who have lived with us over the years, Miss Evija's shyness and reluctance to bond right away is a cake walk (very easy) for us. So when it comes to obeying rules and being safe, Evija gets an all important A+.
So far, things are getting better each day in the shyness category. She opened up to Emily first and they have bonded. I'm so proud of how Emily relentlessly went after Evija and forged the first connection. My daughter is growing up to be a woman of breakthroughs someday!!! She's well on her path. Then Nathan showed her our rope swing and they became fast friends. Just yesterday, Evija bonded with Travis and initiated communication with him. Yes. He had to wait (and try) 5 days for that. I'm still waiting. It hasn't happened with me yet. Please understand, Travis has been at work, the kids at school, and me at home with Evija the whole time. She's not warmed to me very much and doesn't enjoy talking much with me yet. Maybe it's the language barrier? However, if you know me, you know I'm pretty good at communicating. That kind of rejection is hard to take on my heart, but I'm standing in faith that my day will come soon. Who knows what's behind her hesitancy, but I'm going to keep trying different things and bless her with Love.
This morning, Evija got to have a dose of all the Lontzes home! We have a Saturday morning brunch routine that we enjoy very much. In the past, our Saturday brunch cooking is one way we break in new foster kids and see how they react to the "real us". Well, we decided to try it today with Evija. We all broke into different jobs and cook together as we talk 90 miles an hour all squished in the kitchen at once, bumping into each other and laughing our heads off. I'm VERY happy to report that she did well with that! She helped set the table and assisted with Emily's job of scrambling eggs. And SMILED!! YAY!
We're seeing her beautiful smile more and more as this goes on. She enjoyed the Lighthouse (hilarious!) Christmas pageant last night and she delivered Angel Tree gifts with us this morning. We'll see how she does with Grace tomorrow. I discussed church a little 2 days ago because of the Trivett's nativity scene on route 3. There will be many many new things to discuss and do in the coming weeks. It should be fun to show her around and let her explore American museums and culture, etc. We hope she enjoys meeting our friends (and their kids) soon too.
So all in all, we're doing all right. Things were off to a less-than-hoped-for (quiet)start, but we're seeing the ice melt and slowly we're all bonding. We like her very much! Any prayers would be appreciated. Pray for safety, clear communication, and blessings! I may not be able to write as often as some would like, but I'm doing my best. And we DO APPRECIATE all of you who are encouraging us along the way! Thank you!
Evija made it here safely! I will try to post a few photos next week. Some of you out there have rose colored glasses on in regards to orphan care. If you would like to continue with those on, please stop reading here and check back with me another time. Those of you who don't mind a tiny dose of edited reality, read on.
Things were off to a rough start. Evija greeted us with her arms crossed and quiet for the first few days. We quickly found out she understands little English and doesn't feel comfortable trying to speak it. Therefore she's had to endure our less than perfect Latvian grammar and our slowness in speech. It's been almost 12 years since we lived in Latvia, so Travis and I are more than a little rusty. And our kids don't speak Latvian at all. I feel for her. She had just traveled 4,500 miles to meet strangers, then have to stay in a hotel room with them. It's no wonder she was scared and less than happy to see us. Then her first impression of America was the New Jersey Turnpike. I don't care what Pat Mahoney says, that part of NJ is like the unshaved armpit of America. In addition to the smoking factory scenery and bumpy roads, her silence and unwillingness to communicate other than with body language (arms crossed and looking away) made for a VERY long first two days. We got home from our 7 hour miserable car ride and our thoughts were along the lines of, "What have we done?" and, "At this rate, this is going to be a looooong month."
Also, in the first few days, we had to deal with practical stuff, like introducing deodorant, toothbrushes, and American underwear sizes, and other feminine hygiene products. Yay me. The orphanage sent her with one and a half outfits for her month long stay (one pair of pants and 2 shirts.) Trying to navigate clothing purchases and some other female stuff within the first 2 days did not endear Miss Evija to liking me. I smiled a lot, tried very hard with the language, used my pocket translator, and my Latvian friend Marika translated some emails for me. We got through it. Introducing our household routines (like this is a dishwasher, these are the foods we eat, and here's how we do laundry, etc.) has been fairly smooth. She seems to catch on to our ways and she has an appreciation for how easy those things are here. (If only all American teens realized this!)
And I must point out the positive side: Evija is a trustworthy young lady! She's been respectful of our stuff, she's complied with bedtimes, basic rules, and such. After doing foster care, we're well aware of what we could be dealing with. I don't have to worry about her destroying things, wandering the house at night, or trying to hurt our kids. Compared to some kids who have lived with us over the years, Miss Evija's shyness and reluctance to bond right away is a cake walk (very easy) for us. So when it comes to obeying rules and being safe, Evija gets an all important A+.
So far, things are getting better each day in the shyness category. She opened up to Emily first and they have bonded. I'm so proud of how Emily relentlessly went after Evija and forged the first connection. My daughter is growing up to be a woman of breakthroughs someday!!! She's well on her path. Then Nathan showed her our rope swing and they became fast friends. Just yesterday, Evija bonded with Travis and initiated communication with him. Yes. He had to wait (and try) 5 days for that. I'm still waiting. It hasn't happened with me yet. Please understand, Travis has been at work, the kids at school, and me at home with Evija the whole time. She's not warmed to me very much and doesn't enjoy talking much with me yet. Maybe it's the language barrier? However, if you know me, you know I'm pretty good at communicating. That kind of rejection is hard to take on my heart, but I'm standing in faith that my day will come soon. Who knows what's behind her hesitancy, but I'm going to keep trying different things and bless her with Love.
This morning, Evija got to have a dose of all the Lontzes home! We have a Saturday morning brunch routine that we enjoy very much. In the past, our Saturday brunch cooking is one way we break in new foster kids and see how they react to the "real us". Well, we decided to try it today with Evija. We all broke into different jobs and cook together as we talk 90 miles an hour all squished in the kitchen at once, bumping into each other and laughing our heads off. I'm VERY happy to report that she did well with that! She helped set the table and assisted with Emily's job of scrambling eggs. And SMILED!! YAY!
We're seeing her beautiful smile more and more as this goes on. She enjoyed the Lighthouse (hilarious!) Christmas pageant last night and she delivered Angel Tree gifts with us this morning. We'll see how she does with Grace tomorrow. I discussed church a little 2 days ago because of the Trivett's nativity scene on route 3. There will be many many new things to discuss and do in the coming weeks. It should be fun to show her around and let her explore American museums and culture, etc. We hope she enjoys meeting our friends (and their kids) soon too.
So all in all, we're doing all right. Things were off to a less-than-hoped-for (quiet)start, but we're seeing the ice melt and slowly we're all bonding. We like her very much! Any prayers would be appreciated. Pray for safety, clear communication, and blessings! I may not be able to write as often as some would like, but I'm doing my best. And we DO APPRECIATE all of you who are encouraging us along the way! Thank you!
Sunday, December 11, 2011
On the Cusp!
Evija is already traveling to America by now. It's absolutely crazy to think that she's in the air and headed our way. We are just now getting around to cleaning up and getting ready for her arrival ~ less than 24 hours away! Having done that trip many times in our lives, Travis and I are full of empathy for the jet lag that will ensue. Nonetheless, we look forward to meeting her and finally getting to the point where our lives and her life intersect. On the Cusp indeed!
With Travis being sooooo sick last week and me still recovering from the car accident, we are both moving slowly! Even though we've had AMAZING help from some WONDERFUL friends and family, things are not as perfect around here as I would like it to be for Evija's first impression of the Lontz clan and our life. But perhaps this is a good thing. She'll know right away that we're not perfect! There will be no elevated first impression. I don't always make my bed, have the house in order, or have everything organized or neat. But I do love my family fiercely. That I can do, and do well. She'll be a part of my family for a month, so hopefully she'll experience fierce love and bask in it. And I hope she'll enjoy our extended family, both the blood related side and the chosen friends-that-are-family side that are oh so important to us!
So pray for our transition, safety in travels, clear communications despite language barriers, and for SLEEP! We should be able to post photos in a few days. Thanks for joining in this adventure!
With Travis being sooooo sick last week and me still recovering from the car accident, we are both moving slowly! Even though we've had AMAZING help from some WONDERFUL friends and family, things are not as perfect around here as I would like it to be for Evija's first impression of the Lontz clan and our life. But perhaps this is a good thing. She'll know right away that we're not perfect! There will be no elevated first impression. I don't always make my bed, have the house in order, or have everything organized or neat. But I do love my family fiercely. That I can do, and do well. She'll be a part of my family for a month, so hopefully she'll experience fierce love and bask in it. And I hope she'll enjoy our extended family, both the blood related side and the chosen friends-that-are-family side that are oh so important to us!
So pray for our transition, safety in travels, clear communications despite language barriers, and for SLEEP! We should be able to post photos in a few days. Thanks for joining in this adventure!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
November~ good riddance!!
The Thanksgiving season has been a mixed up season for me. On the one hand, I'm glad to have built in reminders of thankfulness and excuses to get together with friends and family (we had FIVE, count 'em FIVE Thanksgiving feasts this year!~Yum!) However, in the past few years, it's been overshadowed by the memories of losses that occurred in my life this time of year. Thanksgiving week is the anniversary of several different deeply painful things. For example, the courts turned over custody of two of our foster kids to their relatives that week a few years ago. Another year Thanksgiving week is when we welcomed some other kids that we miss dearly now. I don't want to get into details, but there Thanksgiving week these past 5 years has been a complete contrast in joy and pain on oh so many levels.
This year, I was faced with all the above plus I was in yet another car wreck. I stopped at a red light and got rear ended a week before Thanksgiving. The car that hit me was totaled and the impact hurt my back quite a bit, so I ended up being evaluated. In the middle of Frank-the-firefighter checking me, my body started to shake uncontrollably head to toe. This frightened me and thus, added me freaking out to the scenario. And did I mention my back was hurt? Well, shaking just added to the pain too. Frank had his work cut out for him. God bless him~ He stuck with me and talked me through the episode until the shaking subsided. Any of you who've dealt with me when I'm hurt and scared, you know this is no easy task.
Travis finally got to the scene, but we agreed since my life wasn't in danger, he should stay and deal with the cops and getting the van released, then meet me later at the hospital. This sounded good in theory, until I shook again in the ambulance. Then they wheeled me into the hospital room and prepped me for X-rays. I had to remove any metal, so I had to be in a lovely gown. Frank stayed with me through the prep period, and kept talking to ensure I wouldn't spazz again. I was thankful for his help, but he said goodbye as I went into the X-ray room, saying he was still on duty and had to go.
After SEVEN painful positions for X-rays were over, I was once again in a dark hospital room. There were 3 wrecks in our city within an hour that night, so the State Trooper took much longer than expected to get to Travis.
So there I lay: cold, frightened, shaky, in pain, and completely alone. :(
Not exactly how I wanted to spend my Thursday night. Much to my surprise, after a few minutes, Frank walked back into my room. He said he found out Travis would be delayed and he knew I'd need someone, so he came back for me. He was a sight for sore eyes and balm to my soul. He could only stay with me an extra 10 minutes or so b/c we had a second set of X-rays to do, but that courtesy went miles in my mind that night.
So as I bid another November good riddance, I'm still as mixed up as ever. This season also added its contrasts to my experience. The car wreck on the con, but Frank definitely helped balance the scales. Here's to all those out there who go the extra mile to care for strangers. This season I'm thankful that there are people like you in the world!
This year, I was faced with all the above plus I was in yet another car wreck. I stopped at a red light and got rear ended a week before Thanksgiving. The car that hit me was totaled and the impact hurt my back quite a bit, so I ended up being evaluated. In the middle of Frank-the-firefighter checking me, my body started to shake uncontrollably head to toe. This frightened me and thus, added me freaking out to the scenario. And did I mention my back was hurt? Well, shaking just added to the pain too. Frank had his work cut out for him. God bless him~ He stuck with me and talked me through the episode until the shaking subsided. Any of you who've dealt with me when I'm hurt and scared, you know this is no easy task.
Travis finally got to the scene, but we agreed since my life wasn't in danger, he should stay and deal with the cops and getting the van released, then meet me later at the hospital. This sounded good in theory, until I shook again in the ambulance. Then they wheeled me into the hospital room and prepped me for X-rays. I had to remove any metal, so I had to be in a lovely gown. Frank stayed with me through the prep period, and kept talking to ensure I wouldn't spazz again. I was thankful for his help, but he said goodbye as I went into the X-ray room, saying he was still on duty and had to go.
After SEVEN painful positions for X-rays were over, I was once again in a dark hospital room. There were 3 wrecks in our city within an hour that night, so the State Trooper took much longer than expected to get to Travis.
So there I lay: cold, frightened, shaky, in pain, and completely alone. :(
Not exactly how I wanted to spend my Thursday night. Much to my surprise, after a few minutes, Frank walked back into my room. He said he found out Travis would be delayed and he knew I'd need someone, so he came back for me. He was a sight for sore eyes and balm to my soul. He could only stay with me an extra 10 minutes or so b/c we had a second set of X-rays to do, but that courtesy went miles in my mind that night.
So as I bid another November good riddance, I'm still as mixed up as ever. This season also added its contrasts to my experience. The car wreck on the con, but Frank definitely helped balance the scales. Here's to all those out there who go the extra mile to care for strangers. This season I'm thankful that there are people like you in the world!
Thursday, November 17, 2011
25 days!
Time is flying! We can't believe in just 25 short days, we'll be meeting Evija for the first time. Things have been challenging over here with paperwork being more than we originally understood and, of course, several glitches along the way. There were even a few weeks when we thought we wouldn't be able to meet deadlines, but it finally looks like everything is in order. We just have one last 3.5 hour training this Sunday and we'll be good to proceed!
I just found out Evija's last name this morning. I can't share the name, but I can share the significance. As soon as I read it, I was floored. She's named after a type of tree that's federally protected in Latvia. It's strong and made to endure hardship, yet thrive and provide rest for others. I felt like God allowed me some insight into her life and personality through her name. Being an orphan, she's already endured so much, yet she's willing to take risks (coming to America to stay with us) that will broaden her future and she has already been a blessing to those around her in the orphanage. I like this girl already! Also, her first name means "reliable, and stable, yet wanting to know the heart of others." The orphanage director's description of her agrees with her names. I know it's dangerous to put expectations on a person, as we're all human; but I believe Miss Evija will be a good match for our family and we're all looking forward to meeting her.
However, 25 days is not a lot of time, especially when you add everything else into the mix. There is much to accomplish on our end in that short amount of time. I just got permission for some time off work with one job and I'll be meeting with my other employer asap to agree on a schedule. There are also a swirl of other details to be tackled and a few unknowns in the mix. Please pray for favor and direction as we continue to move forward! :) Thank you!!
I just found out Evija's last name this morning. I can't share the name, but I can share the significance. As soon as I read it, I was floored. She's named after a type of tree that's federally protected in Latvia. It's strong and made to endure hardship, yet thrive and provide rest for others. I felt like God allowed me some insight into her life and personality through her name. Being an orphan, she's already endured so much, yet she's willing to take risks (coming to America to stay with us) that will broaden her future and she has already been a blessing to those around her in the orphanage. I like this girl already! Also, her first name means "reliable, and stable, yet wanting to know the heart of others." The orphanage director's description of her agrees with her names. I know it's dangerous to put expectations on a person, as we're all human; but I believe Miss Evija will be a good match for our family and we're all looking forward to meeting her.
However, 25 days is not a lot of time, especially when you add everything else into the mix. There is much to accomplish on our end in that short amount of time. I just got permission for some time off work with one job and I'll be meeting with my other employer asap to agree on a schedule. There are also a swirl of other details to be tackled and a few unknowns in the mix. Please pray for favor and direction as we continue to move forward! :) Thank you!!
Monday, October 17, 2011
Ode to Lisa Jones!
Well, today was an interesting day. My daughter went home sick from school (something that's never happened before.) She stayed with a neighbor b/c I don't have sick leave built in. At the end of the day, I was waiting for my son to get home from a field trip so I could then pick Emily up and attend to her properly. I was on the phone organizing some stuff for my job at the school when I overheard the owner of the school saying Nathan's bus had been in a wreck. I hung up on the person I was talking to and promptly picked up Travis and drove to the accident scene. We arrived at the intersection to see around 7 squad cars/fire trucks/ ambulances. There were 2 totaled vehicles and the damaged bus. We weaved our way through the chaos until we found Nathan. He was relatively calm and unharmed, watching his friends being taken by stretchers to the ambulances. MY SON WAS OKAY! But others were not. There was nothing I could do for the children on stretchers, but I could do something for the ones crying hysterically as they watched as bystanders. I know b/c someone once helped my children as they watched horrors around them.
This scene today reminded me oh so much of when the logging truck hit us in AL. That day, once upon a time, Travis and I were trapped in our car and our kids were taken by ambulance to the hospital without us. It was our second day in AL, so we knew no one. A wonderful stranger, Lisa Jones, did something that changed my life. She saw that it would take a while for them to "jaws of life" me out of the car, so she followed the ambulance with my children, who were bawling and begging not to be separated from us (and it didn't help that they saw us hurt and bloody.) She then spent much of her day walking from the children's wing of the hospital to us, updating our family members on how the others were doing. ~At the expense of missing her sons' baseball games. It touched me so much that someone would care enough to stop and help, taking such preemptive measures against fear that threatened to consume us. I decided right then that if it was in my power to do so, I'd help other families when the situation arose.
Well, today was my day. Even though my son was okay and I had every reason to go and attend to my sick daughter, I could not leave the scene. I spent the next hour letting kids sit on my lap, holding various hands and talking non stop with the kids, explaining what was happening and doing everything in my power to ease their fears until their parents came. I'm not normally a patient person. It was the workings of the Spirit and I'm pretty sure it was the growth of the seeds that Lisa Jones planted in all our hearts April 11th, 2009. So this is not a pat on my back. An hour was the least I could do. This is a deep bow to Lisa Jones and people like her in my life. Their witness and character make me want to be a better woman. And this is a deeper still bow to God. Even though it was AWFUL to go through, I can see fruit sprouting from our wreck oh so long ago. This isn't the first time I've seen fruit from that tremendous pain and suffering. Strange how that works. I still wouldn't choose to do it again, but I can see loving hands working all things to the good.
Yes, God is good. Amen!
This scene today reminded me oh so much of when the logging truck hit us in AL. That day, once upon a time, Travis and I were trapped in our car and our kids were taken by ambulance to the hospital without us. It was our second day in AL, so we knew no one. A wonderful stranger, Lisa Jones, did something that changed my life. She saw that it would take a while for them to "jaws of life" me out of the car, so she followed the ambulance with my children, who were bawling and begging not to be separated from us (and it didn't help that they saw us hurt and bloody.) She then spent much of her day walking from the children's wing of the hospital to us, updating our family members on how the others were doing. ~At the expense of missing her sons' baseball games. It touched me so much that someone would care enough to stop and help, taking such preemptive measures against fear that threatened to consume us. I decided right then that if it was in my power to do so, I'd help other families when the situation arose.
Well, today was my day. Even though my son was okay and I had every reason to go and attend to my sick daughter, I could not leave the scene. I spent the next hour letting kids sit on my lap, holding various hands and talking non stop with the kids, explaining what was happening and doing everything in my power to ease their fears until their parents came. I'm not normally a patient person. It was the workings of the Spirit and I'm pretty sure it was the growth of the seeds that Lisa Jones planted in all our hearts April 11th, 2009. So this is not a pat on my back. An hour was the least I could do. This is a deep bow to Lisa Jones and people like her in my life. Their witness and character make me want to be a better woman. And this is a deeper still bow to God. Even though it was AWFUL to go through, I can see fruit sprouting from our wreck oh so long ago. This isn't the first time I've seen fruit from that tremendous pain and suffering. Strange how that works. I still wouldn't choose to do it again, but I can see loving hands working all things to the good.
Yes, God is good. Amen!
Friday, October 14, 2011
And then there was one........
Change is always in the air when doing fostering of any type and you learn very quickly to be flexible or you'll snap. This round of orphan care is no exception. We originally signed up for 2 kids, a boy our son's age and a girl our daughter's age. Well, the day after we committed to those 2, the director left us a message saying, "We need to talk." Between the time Project 143 interviewed the children in Latvia and the time we committed, the boy assigned to us became in need of medical care and is no longer able to travel to the US. So he's off the list and we're only hosting Evija, the girl our daughter's age. We're still excited to have her come!!
I was just reading "Kisses From Katie" this week about Katie Davis, who is adopting 13 girls in Uganda. In the book, Katie had an incident where she felt prompted to ask an elderly lady to live with her. She prayed and wrestled with whether she could handle it or not. She finally decided in faith to offer her home and let God work it out. Immediately after she offered, the woman said, "No, thank you." Katie laughed to herself and realized sometimes God asks us to do stuff just to test us and build us up. I feel a little bit of empathy for that situation. We were told it would be easier to just host one child at a time. However, when we were trying to choose between the 2 kids, we just could not say no to either of them. Even though we knew it would be a bigger undertaking, we felt in our hearts that we should offer our home to both and let God work it out. Well, God did work it out, just differently than we expected. With the boy pulled from the program, we're down to one. But we feel guided, protected, and hopeful that this will be a good experience.
Thanks for tuning in. We should know a bit more in a few weeks. :)
I was just reading "Kisses From Katie" this week about Katie Davis, who is adopting 13 girls in Uganda. In the book, Katie had an incident where she felt prompted to ask an elderly lady to live with her. She prayed and wrestled with whether she could handle it or not. She finally decided in faith to offer her home and let God work it out. Immediately after she offered, the woman said, "No, thank you." Katie laughed to herself and realized sometimes God asks us to do stuff just to test us and build us up. I feel a little bit of empathy for that situation. We were told it would be easier to just host one child at a time. However, when we were trying to choose between the 2 kids, we just could not say no to either of them. Even though we knew it would be a bigger undertaking, we felt in our hearts that we should offer our home to both and let God work it out. Well, God did work it out, just differently than we expected. With the boy pulled from the program, we're down to one. But we feel guided, protected, and hopeful that this will be a good experience.
Thanks for tuning in. We should know a bit more in a few weeks. :)
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Change is in the Air
Well, most of you know we've had a heart for caring for kids who have no one else for all of our married life. We did orphan work a little in Latvia, did foster care for close to 6 years here in the US, sponsored kids and some other avenues along the way etc. This is not for a pat on the back, just giving some background on us. We looked into hosting programs many years ago, but our children were so young at the time (2 and 4). We always said we'd look into it again when the kids got older. Well, they're now 10 and 11, so we thought we'd look into it again. We've been researching and praying about what avenue to take for about 5-6 months now. We're happy to say, we've been accepted in "Project 143"'s winter host program. Two Latvian orphans will be coming to stay with us for 4 weeks (approximately Dec. 15-Jan 15). (Email me if you want to see pictures!)
The idea is to bless them with some time in America, some time with a family, and some time to celebrate holidays here. I'm so glad we lived in Latvia for 2 years, so we can hopefully make this a very smooth transition for them~~ although we may be skyping with Marika (my BFF from my time in Latvia) quite a bit! Hopefully some of you will want to follow this journey with us. If not, that's okay too. One of the things I learned in AL was this: God will provide the friendships we need and prune the rest. And in other circumstances, he grafts people into our lives, whether temporarily or permanently to allow them to be a part of our family. All 4 of us are looking forward to these kids being a part of our family for a month. We'll see what comes of it! :)
The idea is to bless them with some time in America, some time with a family, and some time to celebrate holidays here. I'm so glad we lived in Latvia for 2 years, so we can hopefully make this a very smooth transition for them~~ although we may be skyping with Marika (my BFF from my time in Latvia) quite a bit! Hopefully some of you will want to follow this journey with us. If not, that's okay too. One of the things I learned in AL was this: God will provide the friendships we need and prune the rest. And in other circumstances, he grafts people into our lives, whether temporarily or permanently to allow them to be a part of our family. All 4 of us are looking forward to these kids being a part of our family for a month. We'll see what comes of it! :)
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Quakin' in my boots! :)
Just a quick note to let everyone know we're okay after yesterday's earthquake here in Va. The kids were in the garage and I was on the first floor. I ran through the house, yelling at them to get out of the house. I was like a mother hen with my arms open wide, shooing them out with one child in the crook of each elbow. We huddled in the driveway until the ground stopped roiling. Then 4 families from our street sat in a neighbor's front yard, awaiting after shocks and passing a cordless phone line line that worked b/c all cell service was out. A weird note, while out in the yard, the kids noticed droves of crickets and bugs hopping like made from the forest toward our road. I guess even insects have the survival instinct to get to open ground!
My parents' VA house is about 3 miles from the epicenter. Thankfully, Mom and Dad were on vacation at my sister's in TX. And with double thanks, the protective equipment worked at the local nuclear power plant!! So there was minimal damage at both our house and my parents' house. We have a crack in our porch, some stuff fell off shelves and easy stuff like that. My parents had slight damage to some of their decorations and that was it. All in all, it was not such a big deal. Scary, yes! but minor nonetheless.
Now we'll see what happens with this hurricane nonsense that's headed our way. My guess is it will be a category 1 or less by this weekend. For those of you who don't know, category 1 is like a big rain storm. I'm not too concerned yet. We'll see. Never a dull moment!!
My parents' VA house is about 3 miles from the epicenter. Thankfully, Mom and Dad were on vacation at my sister's in TX. And with double thanks, the protective equipment worked at the local nuclear power plant!! So there was minimal damage at both our house and my parents' house. We have a crack in our porch, some stuff fell off shelves and easy stuff like that. My parents had slight damage to some of their decorations and that was it. All in all, it was not such a big deal. Scary, yes! but minor nonetheless.
Now we'll see what happens with this hurricane nonsense that's headed our way. My guess is it will be a category 1 or less by this weekend. For those of you who don't know, category 1 is like a big rain storm. I'm not too concerned yet. We'll see. Never a dull moment!!
Friday, August 12, 2011
True to the Title
When I started this blog, it was mostly for chronicling a bike event I did across Alabama~ hence "There and back again". I didn't know at the time how applicable that title would be in regular life as well. In May of 2009, we left VA bruised and battered (from a van wreck and some emotionally difficult circumstances). The first 6 months of Travis's grad work and living in Auburn were kinda rough, but the last 20 were completely amazing! The Deep South opened up a whole new world for us and we very open to staying there or moving elsewhere. After Travis applying to 70+ jobs in various places, we are surprised to find ourselves "Back Again" here in VA in the same house we left. He has a different job, but associated with the same people, just in a different company.
We're very thankful for a great job, especially in this economy, but I'm a little unsettled from the move. The adage is true: one never can "just go home" after moving away. Things are always different as people and things morph and change in this ever fluid craziness called life. But here's a good part: I don't WANT my old life back! Yes, some key friends are keepers for life, but for the most part, our family is ready to take what we've learned and apply all our changes to life wherever we are. Fredericksburg has sure changed since living here too. And it's nice to see so many positive changes in friends' lives as well. Seems we're all pressing in to find our paths.
This month should prove to be telling for us. Travis starts his job Monday, we have to make decisions about the kids' schooling next week, and I'm not sure what's in store for me personally yet. We're also searching to find our place in the greater community. We're going to be checking out some churches, service organizations, and clubs to see where our family's experience can help the most. Not only that, but we need to find what is the best fit for the atmosphere we crave.
SOME things are familiar, though. True to form, we've already had an ER visit within 2 days of being back. Our son decided to cut a cardboard moving box with his new and bigger pocket knife he got for his b'day. He ended up slicing his thumb something fierce. But all in all, this probably saved us a longer hospital stay. When the doctor asked him what his was making, he replied, "a snowboard so I can ski down our stairs." (Can you tell Monkey-boy has lived in a one level rambler for the past 2+ years?) So that prompted our 8th talk with him about what function our stairs will and will not play in his life. We sure hope to extinguish our hospital prone tendencies. Let's pray this is the last one we'll have until one of our kids is married and has a baby!
Thanks to everyone who helped us move in! Thanks to everyone who just stopped by this week. I LOVE THAT! :) And to those in Auburn, I've cried over missing you this week. You are loved and missed!!
We're very thankful for a great job, especially in this economy, but I'm a little unsettled from the move. The adage is true: one never can "just go home" after moving away. Things are always different as people and things morph and change in this ever fluid craziness called life. But here's a good part: I don't WANT my old life back! Yes, some key friends are keepers for life, but for the most part, our family is ready to take what we've learned and apply all our changes to life wherever we are. Fredericksburg has sure changed since living here too. And it's nice to see so many positive changes in friends' lives as well. Seems we're all pressing in to find our paths.
This month should prove to be telling for us. Travis starts his job Monday, we have to make decisions about the kids' schooling next week, and I'm not sure what's in store for me personally yet. We're also searching to find our place in the greater community. We're going to be checking out some churches, service organizations, and clubs to see where our family's experience can help the most. Not only that, but we need to find what is the best fit for the atmosphere we crave.
SOME things are familiar, though. True to form, we've already had an ER visit within 2 days of being back. Our son decided to cut a cardboard moving box with his new and bigger pocket knife he got for his b'day. He ended up slicing his thumb something fierce. But all in all, this probably saved us a longer hospital stay. When the doctor asked him what his was making, he replied, "a snowboard so I can ski down our stairs." (Can you tell Monkey-boy has lived in a one level rambler for the past 2+ years?) So that prompted our 8th talk with him about what function our stairs will and will not play in his life. We sure hope to extinguish our hospital prone tendencies. Let's pray this is the last one we'll have until one of our kids is married and has a baby!
Thanks to everyone who helped us move in! Thanks to everyone who just stopped by this week. I LOVE THAT! :) And to those in Auburn, I've cried over missing you this week. You are loved and missed!!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Under da Sea !!
I'm a pretty adventurous person. Just ask anyone who's known me a while and who's gone on any "Lontz Family Outing" with us. (Several people just snickered at their memories of LFOs with us!) When it comes to food, unless it's Thai-hot, I'll try most anything once. When we're traveling~~ bring it on! I love to see new places and do new things. Go rappelling? No problem. Bobsled run? Done it! The same is true at the beach. Over the years, I've had the privilege of trying some activities in the "strange" and "slightly scary" categories of fun. From para-sailing to sting ray hunting (the big ones!), I've been up for it.
.......As long as it didn't take me far from shore.
Yep, even adventurers have their quirks. Mine is a huge fear of being underwater with a breathing apparatus. This is unfortunate b/c the two things Travis has been longing to do with me are scuba and snorkeling. Shudder! The idea of being out in open water, depending on a device to provide breathable air was enough to strike terror in my heart and send me to the fetal position sucking my thumb.
So Travis has been chipping away at my defenses for 18 years or so. But this year, he decided to change tactics and go for more of a compromise to win me over. He chose my favorite spot (Siesta Key) and asked if I would join the family snorkeling at Point-of-Rocks which is unique in many ways. First, you can swim to it from the beach, so no deep water! This also made it crazy cheap, at something like $9 a person. So I mustered up the courage to say yes for the first time.
That's where my courage ended. On the drive out to the equipment rental place today, I started to have raised heart rate, butterfly tummy, and moderate breathing problems. I'm so glad Travis had me persevere. And it's also no surprise to find the word "severe" in "persevere"! I made it through the fitting, the beach lesson by Travis and then we started to swim out to the rocks. Both kids took to it like Merpeople. They were floating, diving, and wishing the fins would be permanently attached. Me? I hyperventilated and had to back float to refocus. It's akin to having a 5 year old pass you the first time you're on a black diamond ski-slope as you're quaking in your boots. I think I used every calming skill I possessed to put that mask back on and try yet again.
But I'm so glad I did! Once I finally got the hang of breathing through my mouth without panicking, the sight that awaited me would lure anyone to conquer their fear! There were entire schools of fish, crabs, and all kinds of intoxicating colors in the plant life. And in order to see better, you had to dive to the bottom. Within 5 minutes of looking, I was diving and LOVING it!! I'm not a pro by any stretch of the imagination, but I did get a taste of it and want more...someday. I lasted about an hour and then entertained myself at the beach while the other 3 continued to explore. So all in all, it was a good experience. Travis is still saying we'll scuba together one day. Bless his heart. (that's southern-speak for "ain't happenin') But I would like to try snorkeling again. Maybe we'll go to a deep water reef next year.
(Pictured, Point-of-Rocks, Siesta Key, FL)
.......As long as it didn't take me far from shore.
Yep, even adventurers have their quirks. Mine is a huge fear of being underwater with a breathing apparatus. This is unfortunate b/c the two things Travis has been longing to do with me are scuba and snorkeling. Shudder! The idea of being out in open water, depending on a device to provide breathable air was enough to strike terror in my heart and send me to the fetal position sucking my thumb.
So Travis has been chipping away at my defenses for 18 years or so. But this year, he decided to change tactics and go for more of a compromise to win me over. He chose my favorite spot (Siesta Key) and asked if I would join the family snorkeling at Point-of-Rocks which is unique in many ways. First, you can swim to it from the beach, so no deep water! This also made it crazy cheap, at something like $9 a person. So I mustered up the courage to say yes for the first time.
That's where my courage ended. On the drive out to the equipment rental place today, I started to have raised heart rate, butterfly tummy, and moderate breathing problems. I'm so glad Travis had me persevere. And it's also no surprise to find the word "severe" in "persevere"! I made it through the fitting, the beach lesson by Travis and then we started to swim out to the rocks. Both kids took to it like Merpeople. They were floating, diving, and wishing the fins would be permanently attached. Me? I hyperventilated and had to back float to refocus. It's akin to having a 5 year old pass you the first time you're on a black diamond ski-slope as you're quaking in your boots. I think I used every calming skill I possessed to put that mask back on and try yet again.
But I'm so glad I did! Once I finally got the hang of breathing through my mouth without panicking, the sight that awaited me would lure anyone to conquer their fear! There were entire schools of fish, crabs, and all kinds of intoxicating colors in the plant life. And in order to see better, you had to dive to the bottom. Within 5 minutes of looking, I was diving and LOVING it!! I'm not a pro by any stretch of the imagination, but I did get a taste of it and want more...someday. I lasted about an hour and then entertained myself at the beach while the other 3 continued to explore. So all in all, it was a good experience. Travis is still saying we'll scuba together one day. Bless his heart. (that's southern-speak for "ain't happenin') But I would like to try snorkeling again. Maybe we'll go to a deep water reef next year.
(Pictured, Point-of-Rocks, Siesta Key, FL)
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Florida.....balm for the soul
It's funny, I was reading a blog post from a friend up north who was in FL at the same time we were. She whined about the humidity and complained about the off season crowds. I was just about to think of her as a wimp, but then I remembered 3 years ago when I had my first dose of real AL humidity. Maybe she's not a wimp; maybe I'm just acclimated! Reason #74 that I'm glad I moved to AL: We've adjusted such that oppressive humidity and can enjoy summer anywhere in the South!! It certainly broadened our options and made is so we've enjoyed being outdoors here in FL 6-7 hours a day. And we've certainly enjoyed our time in AL this summer. It's been 1000% better than the last two summers, hands down!! A very soothing and loving way to end an all so important chapter in our lives.
Lastly for this post, I'm thankful for technology. Travis was able to skype his classes and come with us! Yay! And he can do homework and regular work on line with his laptop. It's amazing what can be accomplished remotely in this day and age. It's also helpful that I have a responsible hubby who can be trusted to finish well even though he's away. And to answer everyone's question of the month, "What's next??" Well, I thank you for your concern and care for asking, but unfortunately, our answer is still, "We don't know." I hope to have good news soon.
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